Wow, the weeks are just flying by! I can’t believe it’s already time for “Silly Sunday” again!
To recap Silly Sunday, each Sunday I will post a funny article, story, joke etc. If you would like to participate, send me your funny or feel free to share it in the comments. If you email it to me I will post it (assuming it’s not sexually explicit or crammed with obscenities) along with a link to your blog so folks can take a look at your work.
This weeks submission was sent in by my new golf student, my absolute best friend and Glock N’ Cuffs co-author/editor, Aza over at Surreptitious Psychosis last week. However, Dad emailed me the Dave Barry “colonoscopy” funny and she wanted to post his first.
New Drugs For Women
D A M N I T O L
Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.
ST. M O M M A'S W O R T
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.
E M P T Y N E S T R O G E N
Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
P E P T O B I M B O
Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.
D U M B E R O L
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.
F L I P I T O R
Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
M E N I C I L L I N
Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person . Can we get naked now?"
B U Y A G R A
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.
J A C K A S S P I R I N
Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
A N T I-T A L K S I D E N T
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.
N A G A M E T
When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.
I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later!