I think I am going to live!

Wow has this a very stressful couple of weeks here in the big city!!! First, I want to thank each and every one of you for your kind words and support for my recent post. I do have an update and will share that with you.

After the shock wore off I did make an appointment with my doctor the next day. I walked in, sat down and presented him with my lab results. He listened to my concerns and promptly said, “If you should get a fever it would be in your best interest to immediately go to the emergency room!” Needless to say, that sat me straight up in the chair! I asked him a ton of questions that were all answered with the deadliest most fatal things you could think of, he was presenting worst case senerios. I of course was numb thinking I am dying with cancer, aids, leukemia and everything else under the sun. I was told that I needed to get another blood test done asap so we could compare the two and find out what direction to go in. So, I left knowing absolutely nothing but was even more scared than when I went in. Aza was waiting on me and I of course shared the visit with her. She was very comforting as usual, suggesting all along that it was probably a mild viral infection but, in my mind I was dying.

I had to work the next week and I will tell you that I was in no way myself. It showed in every aspect of my life. Poor Aza was doing everything that she could think of to make me laugh, keep me busy, or just take my mind off what was going on. She took me golfing, to the movies, rode the motorcycle all over and visited a few friends. It really did help so I am so grateful for her efforts. The day finally came which was last friday when I could break away to get my lab work done. I took off from work and flew out there as quickly as I could to get it done and over with. I was relieved that I at least went; which I can tell you was an acomplishment for me. I am the worlds worst when it comes to doctor visits. As mentioned in my pervious post, I can only attribute this to my parents. I took them each to their appointments when they were both diagnosed with terminal cancer, in both cases their illnesses started with low white blood cell counts. Of course I had to go through the weekend and all the way till Wednesday to finally get my report back. I called my doctors office and was told that I was going to live another day! My blood count went from 2.4 to 7.8 which was well above normal. I was ecstatic and called Aza pronto. She was so relieved and happy, she even threw in a laughing “I told ya so!”.

I am desperately trying to change my way of thinking in regards to the above. I learned that things aren't always as bad as they may appear. I will tell you that my aversion to doctors is not cured but I really would like to try. Aza has gotten me into something that I can tell you I would have never have even considered, Yoga! I love it!!! Ok guy's don't even think about laughing at me. If you haven't tried this, please try it. I was skeptical myself but after one 30 minute session that night I slept the best that I have slept in a long time. So, before you think I am a fruit cake try it!

I can tell you that I can only hope that each of you have somebody in your life that cares about you. I have the best support system that anyone could ask for. If it had not been for Aza, her dad and all of your prayers I question whether I would have even gone back. I did “man up” and thankfully it all worked out. Once again, thank you I really do appreciate all of your kind supportive thoughts and hope that if you should ever need anything you wouldn't hesitate to ask.

I'm Out And We''ll Talk Later!

A long overdue update and prayer request

I really can not believe it has been so long since I have actually posted something on my blog. So much has happened, I’ll try to keep it condensed. We’ll start at Christmas…

Christmas was an absolute blast with Aza and her dad. She got me all of the safety equipment needed for my motorcycle, which I thought was incredible. I have never felt so cared for in my long 48 years of living. I thought when I bought my bike that I would be a macho biker and not get or need a windshield. So for 7 years I was one macho mo fo- with one heck of a neck ache! Since I retired and only have my bike to ride things have changed a bit. I am not so macho anymore. Aza bought me a Memphis Shades windshield as well as the lowers. In all spending a cool $400.00 dollars. I was so appreciative. I now wonder how in the world I went without this important piece of equipment. I used to have neck issues while riding, that almost completely went away. I have almost no resistance at 70 and 75 miles per hour on the highway. What a relief, thanks to my girl. She also bought the worlds loudest motorcycle horn. This horn almost sounds like a darn train horn, it is amazing and a great addition for safety. So basically she absolutely hooked me up, which I so appreciate. She is the best!

That huge surprise I was talking about in my last post? Well, we had an unexpected visitor on Christmas Eve. We were sitting on the couch and I thought I heard footsteps climbing the stairs on my deck. I look up and who do I see?, the future ex! Yep, that's right, big bag of crazy herself showed up at my house with a card in her hand. I was dumb founded and without words. I got up to open the door and she handed me the card and walked off saying “Just thought you should have this”. I again just stood there in shock. What a set of nuts! This woman has bled me dry, tried to make me look like a piece of dog shit in court and is still trying to accomplish this feat. The card was basically written using my step grandson as a pawn telling me he cries for me every night. I was not happy because she knows how much I love this child. Anyway, her disgusting attempt to guilt me back into her life didn't work. What it boils down to is this, she didn’t get awarded permanent alimony along with every penny I’ve earned for the last 27 years so she’s pissed. She figured she could show up, kiss ass and have me on my knees begging for her back. Hahahaha! Not likely you nut job! I have absolutely no reason to go back to living under that type of stress. So see ya!

I felt so sorry for Aza, I got a frantic phone call from her on New Years Eve around 10:30pm. She wanted to know if I had any connections in a nearby county. The reason, her nephew was killed in a traffic crash- he was only 20 years old. Oh I felt so sorry for her but as always she was and has been a pillar of strength and brought the entire family through this incredibly difficult time. God Bless her, she‘s been through so much but still keeps her head on straight!

Aza and I decided back in December that for the New Year aside from our regular local games we wanted to play a different golf course once a month for 12 months. It has to be a course that neither of us has played and it has to be outside of our city. She started a photo album and will put together pictures of each game at each new course. We started our first course for January in Deland Florida. “Victoria Hills” was absolutely beautiful and so much fun! She shot a fantastic score for only playing the game for only 7 months. We had a great time after as well. I got to meet some of her friends that live in central Florida and we all had dinner. We haven't decided where our February game will be.

I think I mentioned I may process with a smaller surrounding department. I decided to turn the application in to start the process. They told me to go get my physical and blood work done, so I did only to get a very scary and unnerving result. They told me that my white blood count was very low and to follow up with my primary care doctor. I of course was mad as hell but really more freaked completely out. Thank God again for my girl she has been my source of calm. I do not do the doctor thing. I honestly have in my own mind a significant fear of getting results of blood work etc. I know this developed because of all that I went through with my parents. Every time I took them they came back with terminal conditions. I just can not seem to shake that experience. So after all that I am going to follow up tomorrow so please keep me in your prayers! I will let you know.

So I am sorry for not posting, I have just had a lot on my mind as well as a lot going on. I will most definitely try a bit harder to keep all of you posted. I still am waiting on the judge to sign off on my divorce. This has been since Oct 16th!! Geez are you kidding me!?

I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!

Merry Christmas To All My Fellow Bloggers!

I hope that all of you have a very Merry Christmas or whatever holiday you may celebrate.

It has been a very fast paced year filled with a ton of emotions, oddities, surprises (a HUGE one today!) and other life altering moments. The one thing that I can honestly say that hasn't changed is my love for my very best friend in the world Aza and her family. The other is the warm and caring thoughts that I have for each of you that I have come to know through my blog. I sincerely hope that this is a special Christmas and most all, a very prosperous New Year!

Here's a picture of the Christmas tree that Aza and I put up.





God Bless you all! I've got a surprising update coming after Christmas but for now, I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!

Updates all around

Well we made it through the first big holiday of the season just fine. Turkey day was a big success, of course Aza did all the cooking which was fantastic. She wanted me to ask a few of the guys I work with that don't have any real family to come over for the day. I thought that was a very sweet thing to do. Aside from a few friends outside of work, I asked four guys that I work with to come and they happily accepted. One of the guys brought his mother, which I was certainly fine with. I was pretty concerned when they got to my house, the first thing she did when she rolled up was freak completely out when she saw my 15 year old dog! She started screaming how scared she was of dogs so I had to convince her that the dog was perfectly harmless. After all that she finally agreed to come in the yard, only to ask the question “Do you have any more animals?” Oh geez lady are you kidding me!? Yes I replied, a chicken, 2 squirrels and 3 cats. She almost fell out screaming that she was afraid of all animals. I was thinking, "ok lady you just need to pack up and leave", but being the nice guy that I am I once again reassured her that all would be good. So, she finally walked in the door and I think had the time of her life after meeting Aza. Of course who doesn't? All that said I think it was a great success, Aza was phenomenal to everyone that came. She was a great hostess and they were all full as ticks when they left. Mission accomplished, big thanks to my Aza!

We have been taking a lot of trips on the bike. We just recently went to Daytona this last Saturday with a few friends of mine from work. Aza called a friend of hers that she hasn't seen in quite awhile and she ended up meeting us down there. When I met her I swear I thought Aza was there in double. This girl was just as crazy as Aza and wild as a buck! We had a great time. I bought some stuff for my bike at J&P Cycles. We also went to the Daytona Harley Davidson shop which was absolutely amazing. I walked out of there drooling and dying to buy a Harley but common sense and Aza prevailed. I rode my bike back to the ghetto with sadness in my heart but that's ok one day (very soon I hope) I will own a Harley.

In other news I got an interesting phone call from a good friend of mine a couple of weeks ago. He was a Lieutenant with my department, retiring early to go into the construction business when it was booming. Well needless to say it was not a great move. He is now working for a department near our city. He said that the Sheriff is wanting to hire retired officers with experience and my name came up. Since that call he’s called back every other day basically begging me to put in the application. The Sheriff has told him that he wants to restructure in the very near future, wanting some experience in his administration. I would make rank incredibly fast. So now I am faced with the decision do I go or do I stay. I am praying about it and talking it over with Aza who is in full support regardless of my decision. I will keep you posted.

We have a big occasion coming up on the 19th, Aza will celebrate a birthday. She is so deserving of so many wonderful things because she puts up with all my B.S. I am going to try and make it a great day for her. If you get a chance drop in to her blog and wish her a big ol happy birthday.

I hope that all of you have a wonderful holiday and an even better new year!! I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!

I can't believe it's already Thanksgiving!

Hey ya'll!!! I am sorry I haven't been able to post much, been really busy. I am still waiting on my divorce to become final it has been one heck of a slow process but I guess I am closer than before.

Aza and I have been super busy between the two households, she really is amazing taking care of both houses. We have been going to St. Augustine on the motorcycle the last few weekends. The weather has been great but unseasonably cold. We went down last weekend to see the pirate gathering. We hesitated about going because it looked like it was going to rain. We decided to go for it and of course it rained on us a little bit but not too bad. We had a great time as usual but I have to say the funniest thing that happened was a female pirate and several others decided to “siege” or take over one of the trolley's that carries people around on short tours. She jumped up on the trolley and when she did the wrap around skirt she had on went a little east to west and exposed her 60 year old cottage cheesy moon crater ass right there in front of everybody. I started stifling laughter and frantically flailing my arms to signal Aza to come look but she was way ahead of me with the camera getting a shot of a full moon up close. WOW, was it scary looking! We also have been hanging with a few guy's I work with that have bikes so we have been riding a lot. So much so that I have a major itch to buy a Harley Davidson. I have always wanted one but had always been told I couldn't get one. Well I got news for you I will have a Harley very soon. Not just now, it'll have to wait until I get all this divorce drama over with. Aza has gotten the same itch so she is looking for a bike as well. I knew she would get tired of riding “bitch”. She is very athletic so I think she will do just fine on a bike. I am not sure she is sold on a Harley but she did find a beautiful 2007 Low rider that she really likes so you never know.

Thanksgiving is of course a few days away and I'm going to have a house full; 10 at last count. Aza has the absolute biggest heart. She has decided that a few of our friends that have no spouses or family will join us for the big day. I think that is the sweetest thing and what a great way to make people happy on a day that might be very sad for them. After her mom died she and her dad had a number of holidays come and go that they celebrated together without anyone. She's made it clear that she doesn't want anyone we know going through that. That's my girl though always thinking of others beside herself.

So with that, I wish all of you a very happy Thanksgiving. I hope that those of you that need special prayers answered will have them answered! May God Bless All Of You!

I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!

What is the meaning of "We"?

First let me say that I am a firm believer that whoever leads our country should have full support from every American! I am appalled at what I am seeing and hearing from the black community. It’s mighty funny that the very people that want to be equal and be treated equally are now the ones that are using racial statements because “THEIR” candidate won the election. I have heard it for the last 2 years since he decided to run. All you hear (or at least all I’m hearing at work and around town) is “We did it” from the black community, meaning that “we” the blacks of America, got one of “ours” elected. Well I’ll tell you, America voted this man into office, not just the black community. The really sad thing is that it took a man of color to get the black community excited about our country. So to the black Americans that voted for him, I would hope that now you feel like your race has been vindicated that you would stop all of the belly aching and crying that has been going on about how you have been treated so unfairly for so many years!

Hollywood Divorce Update, Breaking News

Well, I don't know if I should laugh, cry, be mad, or rejoice but here it goes. I finally got THE call at 4:15 pm yesterday. My attorney asked me, “What do you think the decision was?” I replied with, “Who the hell knows!?”

So this is what it all came down to. The lying, deceptive bitch will get a lump sum of $25 thousand dollars and for the next 6 months I will pay her $1750 a month, plus pay her insurance of $500 dollars each month. After that first 6 months it will drop to only the $500 dollars for insurance for the last 6 months. So basically she is only getting 6 months of “bridge the gap” alimony, $25 grand and a years worth of medical insurance. Overall I am happy with that because 6 months of alimony could have very easily ended up being 5 years of alimony. The judge saw through the b.s.

Now comes the really, really screwed up part. Her attorney said in open court that he had accumulated about $9 thousand dollars in fees that he felt I should pay, but yesterday that figure jumped to $18 thousand dollars that I was ordered to pay. I also have to come up with $3500 dollars within 10 days to pay him. After the first 6 months of paying the bitch, I have to begin paying his fees which broken down will be $1083.00 a month till it's paid off. Well today the judge was looking over the order and had a pretty good laugh when he saw 9K go to 18K over night. He told my attorney that I would only be responsible for $10 thousand of it and the bitch could pay the rest. Regardless, I still have to come up with $3500 immediately. What really burns my ass is that her attorney shouldn't get a damn dime, my first responsibility is to MY attorney.

This is going to be a tremendous burden on me for at least 6 months but I am very happy that it was not permanent alimony or for 2, 3, 4, or 5 years. I am very pissed off that her attorney has inflated his fees, I hope he chokes in his sleep. The dilemma I am faced with now is what do I do with the car. There's no way I can pay $640.00 a month on top of what I am having to pay. I am going to make her give me the car back so I can try and get rid of it somehow. She has already ruined my credit once when her ridiculous spending habits forced us through bankruptcy. I am just now starting to recover from that so I don't want to damage it anymore. I can tell you this, I could care less what she has to drive and at this point she could walk her happy ass down the road. The only satisfaction that I am feeling right now is that this little train will end in a year then she will have to find another dumbass like me to screw out of what he has worked for all his life!

So now I get to figure out how I am going come up with this $3500.00 dollars to pay her attorney in 10 days. I thought about male prostitution but figured that I would probably have to pay them so I guess that won't work. The only thing that I am truly happy about is I have my best friend in the world behind me and beside me which is my Aza. The bitch can't take my animals away from me or my happiness. So I hope that little bit of money makes her happy cause it won't last forever.

I also want to thank all of you for all of your support and allowing me to vent. This has been probably one of the best pieces of advice that my sweet girl Aza told me to do was start this blog. I have come to really look forward to talking with all of you! God Bless!

I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!