I think I am going to live!

Wow has this a very stressful couple of weeks here in the big city!!! First, I want to thank each and every one of you for your kind words and support for my recent post. I do have an update and will share that with you.

After the shock wore off I did make an appointment with my doctor the next day. I walked in, sat down and presented him with my lab results. He listened to my concerns and promptly said, “If you should get a fever it would be in your best interest to immediately go to the emergency room!” Needless to say, that sat me straight up in the chair! I asked him a ton of questions that were all answered with the deadliest most fatal things you could think of, he was presenting worst case senerios. I of course was numb thinking I am dying with cancer, aids, leukemia and everything else under the sun. I was told that I needed to get another blood test done asap so we could compare the two and find out what direction to go in. So, I left knowing absolutely nothing but was even more scared than when I went in. Aza was waiting on me and I of course shared the visit with her. She was very comforting as usual, suggesting all along that it was probably a mild viral infection but, in my mind I was dying.

I had to work the next week and I will tell you that I was in no way myself. It showed in every aspect of my life. Poor Aza was doing everything that she could think of to make me laugh, keep me busy, or just take my mind off what was going on. She took me golfing, to the movies, rode the motorcycle all over and visited a few friends. It really did help so I am so grateful for her efforts. The day finally came which was last friday when I could break away to get my lab work done. I took off from work and flew out there as quickly as I could to get it done and over with. I was relieved that I at least went; which I can tell you was an acomplishment for me. I am the worlds worst when it comes to doctor visits. As mentioned in my pervious post, I can only attribute this to my parents. I took them each to their appointments when they were both diagnosed with terminal cancer, in both cases their illnesses started with low white blood cell counts. Of course I had to go through the weekend and all the way till Wednesday to finally get my report back. I called my doctors office and was told that I was going to live another day! My blood count went from 2.4 to 7.8 which was well above normal. I was ecstatic and called Aza pronto. She was so relieved and happy, she even threw in a laughing “I told ya so!”.

I am desperately trying to change my way of thinking in regards to the above. I learned that things aren't always as bad as they may appear. I will tell you that my aversion to doctors is not cured but I really would like to try. Aza has gotten me into something that I can tell you I would have never have even considered, Yoga! I love it!!! Ok guy's don't even think about laughing at me. If you haven't tried this, please try it. I was skeptical myself but after one 30 minute session that night I slept the best that I have slept in a long time. So, before you think I am a fruit cake try it!

I can tell you that I can only hope that each of you have somebody in your life that cares about you. I have the best support system that anyone could ask for. If it had not been for Aza, her dad and all of your prayers I question whether I would have even gone back. I did “man up” and thankfully it all worked out. Once again, thank you I really do appreciate all of your kind supportive thoughts and hope that if you should ever need anything you wouldn't hesitate to ask.

I'm Out And We''ll Talk Later!

A long overdue update and prayer request

I really can not believe it has been so long since I have actually posted something on my blog. So much has happened, I’ll try to keep it condensed. We’ll start at Christmas…

Christmas was an absolute blast with Aza and her dad. She got me all of the safety equipment needed for my motorcycle, which I thought was incredible. I have never felt so cared for in my long 48 years of living. I thought when I bought my bike that I would be a macho biker and not get or need a windshield. So for 7 years I was one macho mo fo- with one heck of a neck ache! Since I retired and only have my bike to ride things have changed a bit. I am not so macho anymore. Aza bought me a Memphis Shades windshield as well as the lowers. In all spending a cool $400.00 dollars. I was so appreciative. I now wonder how in the world I went without this important piece of equipment. I used to have neck issues while riding, that almost completely went away. I have almost no resistance at 70 and 75 miles per hour on the highway. What a relief, thanks to my girl. She also bought the worlds loudest motorcycle horn. This horn almost sounds like a darn train horn, it is amazing and a great addition for safety. So basically she absolutely hooked me up, which I so appreciate. She is the best!

That huge surprise I was talking about in my last post? Well, we had an unexpected visitor on Christmas Eve. We were sitting on the couch and I thought I heard footsteps climbing the stairs on my deck. I look up and who do I see?, the future ex! Yep, that's right, big bag of crazy herself showed up at my house with a card in her hand. I was dumb founded and without words. I got up to open the door and she handed me the card and walked off saying “Just thought you should have this”. I again just stood there in shock. What a set of nuts! This woman has bled me dry, tried to make me look like a piece of dog shit in court and is still trying to accomplish this feat. The card was basically written using my step grandson as a pawn telling me he cries for me every night. I was not happy because she knows how much I love this child. Anyway, her disgusting attempt to guilt me back into her life didn't work. What it boils down to is this, she didn’t get awarded permanent alimony along with every penny I’ve earned for the last 27 years so she’s pissed. She figured she could show up, kiss ass and have me on my knees begging for her back. Hahahaha! Not likely you nut job! I have absolutely no reason to go back to living under that type of stress. So see ya!

I felt so sorry for Aza, I got a frantic phone call from her on New Years Eve around 10:30pm. She wanted to know if I had any connections in a nearby county. The reason, her nephew was killed in a traffic crash- he was only 20 years old. Oh I felt so sorry for her but as always she was and has been a pillar of strength and brought the entire family through this incredibly difficult time. God Bless her, she‘s been through so much but still keeps her head on straight!

Aza and I decided back in December that for the New Year aside from our regular local games we wanted to play a different golf course once a month for 12 months. It has to be a course that neither of us has played and it has to be outside of our city. She started a photo album and will put together pictures of each game at each new course. We started our first course for January in Deland Florida. “Victoria Hills” was absolutely beautiful and so much fun! She shot a fantastic score for only playing the game for only 7 months. We had a great time after as well. I got to meet some of her friends that live in central Florida and we all had dinner. We haven't decided where our February game will be.

I think I mentioned I may process with a smaller surrounding department. I decided to turn the application in to start the process. They told me to go get my physical and blood work done, so I did only to get a very scary and unnerving result. They told me that my white blood count was very low and to follow up with my primary care doctor. I of course was mad as hell but really more freaked completely out. Thank God again for my girl she has been my source of calm. I do not do the doctor thing. I honestly have in my own mind a significant fear of getting results of blood work etc. I know this developed because of all that I went through with my parents. Every time I took them they came back with terminal conditions. I just can not seem to shake that experience. So after all that I am going to follow up tomorrow so please keep me in your prayers! I will let you know.

So I am sorry for not posting, I have just had a lot on my mind as well as a lot going on. I will most definitely try a bit harder to keep all of you posted. I still am waiting on the judge to sign off on my divorce. This has been since Oct 16th!! Geez are you kidding me!?

I'm Out And We'll Talk Later!