"I sometimes wish that people would put a little more emphasis upon the observance of the law than they do upon its enforcement." ~Calvin Coolidge

Monday, February 18, 2008

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Thanks for the forward, dad! Very funny!

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a 40 caliber Glock, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?


Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day, and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.


Republican's Answer:



Southerner's Answer:


Click..... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?'

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one!'

Wife: 'You're not takin' that to the Taxidermist


Liz said...

Awesome! Can I be a southerner, even though I'm from the far north?

Fire Fox said...

I'm a Yankee Redneck Republican. BANG, BANG, BANG!

Officer "Smith" said...

Turns out I fall somewhere between a Republican and a Southerner. I didn't have to reload...

Mrs. "Smith" said...

I'm a Dem, but my answer is Republican. I'd shoot the guy. So there! LOL

Anonymous said...

Heh. My lineage hails from the deep south, but I was fortunate enough to be born on one of the living in Colorado stints my parents did for so many years.

I love it.


Southerner all the damn way!

Berserk said...

I love it!

My answer would make me a republican, though. Gotta have some ammo for the next one.

Kojak said...

LizI am perfectly ok with you being a southerner! I'm glad you stopped by! Be Safe.

Firefox You be proud of being a damn yankee! Thanks for coming by!

Officer "Smith" Hey it's always good if you don't have to reload, means you gottem the first try!Thanks for coming by. Be Safe !

Mrs "Smith" I'll pray for you, so maybe you will see the light! I'm glad you shot anyway! I appreciate you stopping by.

Still Stacy" I would love to live there! Now that you have a carry permit you will be ready ! Thanks for checking it out!

Dixiechick You go girl, fillem full of holes! Thanks!

Berserk Shoot till the threat ceases, isn't that what we say? Be safe out there!

nottafingga said...

Southern Independent..... I think if he got across the berm the claymores would be more than adequate. My style of urban renewal.

Aza said...

I’ve got to agree with nottafingga on this one (and not just because he’s my dad), the claymore’s will get em every time!

Kojak said...

Nottafinga I need to get with you and pick up some more of those claymore's. I'm working on the berm!

Aza I know what you and Dad are packing!!! Glad we are on the same team !!!! XOXOXOXO.

5150Wife said...

Well, I'd like to say I'm just a Republican because one shot is all I'd need.

But let's be real here. I'm a redneck so I'd throw off a few extra rounds...just to be sure, ya' know. lol