A change is in the air....Smells like....Karma maybe?

Wow! It’s been one helluva a week in regards to Mrs. Ed! So sit back, relax and let Kojak tell ya all about it.

I finally worked out a date and time to retain my property from the “soon to be isn’t soon enough” ex. I was adamant that I was not going to be there for this event, simply because I knew that it just wouldn’t be beneficial for anyone involved. I knew that she would be hateful, nasty, violent, angry, and just a plain old bitch. More importantly, I didn’t want to see her face or be around her. Remember, this is a woman that thought I should be held in contempt because I wore my uniform to our first court date (She had all of my clothes!) Anyway, my fellow squad mates came to my rescue. We put a plan together for them to meet up and head in for operation “Get My Shit!”

I called the neighboring Sheriffs office for obvious reasons. They sent a Sergeant who was eager to assist his fellow law dogs. My guys showed up at my former residence and were greeted by Mrs. Ed. When she realized that I wasn’t there, as expected all hell broke loose. She started screeching that she was absolutely not going to give any of my property to anybody except me, “If he wants his stuff then he better drive over here and get it, because he needs to sign for it!”

Well that went over like a fart in church, so the phone calls began. When I got this news I went off the chain as did Aza who came over to help me when my stuff arrived. I could hear my step daughter in the back ground barking orders, luckily they fell on deaf ears. The Sergeant tried to explain to her that I did not have to be there in person to retrieve my belongings. He tried to explain that the guys were there on my behalf acting as my agent. When you’re not educated, you just don’t grasp simple things, this was a classic case. I finally had to call my attorney, who in turn called her attorney. I had to get my buddy to call from there so she could talk to her attorney on his phone because she would not answer her phone. The end result of that conversation “Give The Man His Shit !“ My boy’s started loading up my stuff.

The first of four arrived a couple hours later. When the final truck rolled in, I was told the news- my mothers bed was not part of the load. I was pissed to say the least. When asked, step daughter said, ”My grandmother left us that bed.” I can tell you that was completely untrue, but then again what do you expect. I also did not get my mother’s diamond ring that has been in the family for over 100 years. I did not get her purse, wallet or the silver certificate printed currency she had collected. I was heart broke when I saw my mothers personal items and keep sakes thrown like trash in boxes and garbage bags. The identification card that my mother kept in her wallet was just thrown in a bag. All that I have left of my parents, mementos of a 27 year career, a history of pictures of my family, my awards and so much more- destroyed, left in the elements. Many of the pictures have serious water damage. I was truly hurt.

Aza was a God send, of course she has been since all of this has started. She was as disgusted as I was when initially met with dozens of garbage bags and half rotted cardboard boxes containing my and my parents belongings. When the shock began to wear off she told me not to worry, that I would get my mom’s bed, ring and other property. No judge in his or her right mind would award her my parents personal effects. I agreed and the clean up began.

Since this all started, I have been under tremendous pressure as is everybody involved, especially financially. I can not explain to anybody that will read this how much negative energy was on my property when this stuff arrived. Aza, who is incredibly in tune with this, was overwhelmed. We have never had issues but we did that day and it carried over to the first part of the next day. The negative stress level was so high, it was unreal. Aza said that nothing was going to come in that house until it was thoroughly washed. Once again, Aza steps up to the plate. This girl has washed clothes for the last four days, folks. If I had to guess I would say at least 40 loads of laundry and counting. She is still washing clothes, but the really awesome thing is that you can feel the energy in the house going from dangerously negative back to incredibly positive. I just can’t tell you how much I cherish having her in my life, she exemplifies what a best friend is. Her husband is a lucky man, but so am I.

Now, here’s some funny stuff. It seems as though Karma has already began to restore some balance and fairness to the situation. I called my attorney the next day to simply thank her for doing such a great job mediating over the phone D-Day. When the secretary answered I could tell that something was different. She told me that she had something to tell me but really wasn’t suppose to. Are you ready? Sitting down?….. Mrs. Ed’s attorney called my attorney and told her in no uncertain terms that he was dropping her as a client because and I quote, “She is a fucking lunatic!” I nearly fell out of my chair! Aza was laughing so hard she almost peed her pants, I had already peed myself so I was just wallowing in it. I hope that this information is true, if it is, it’s about time that I get something positive headed in my direction for a change! I will keep you posted very soon about that rumor.

So for now, I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later!

Happy Easter, I want my stuff!

I hope that everyone in the blog world had a great Easter, I know I did. Aza fixed a fantastic dinner for all of us. Great job Aza! She just plain rocks!

I found out a day that I can finally get my stuff from Mrs. Ed. Supposedly this coming Wednesday. I know it’s shocking, but I think I’m getting closer to having my belongings back in my possession. Now, before you get to excited, she still hasn’t responded in regards to my requested time. I feel pretty certain that she will wait till the last second to tell me. I have asked four of my closest friends to retrieve my items, you have to trust my judgment as to why I am not going. This woman has beat me to death verbally every single time I have either talked to her on the phone or have seen her in person. I am tired of her mouth and threats. Quite frankly, I’m not going to put up with her viciousness anymore. I deal with enough of this crap out on the street day in and day out, I shouldn’t have to deal with it in my personal life too.

The plan at this point is my buddies will meet near my home, I am going to call a deputy from that county as a witness just to be on the safe side. I am not going to subject my friends to anything that will cause them any grief. I think that it will be the best for all involved.

I hope that she can set her vindictive psychosis aside for a moment and realize how important it is for me to get my mothers bed. I am the one that laid in that bed with her when she was dying, I held her, cried with her and slept with her till she woke up. I have to give her props because she was good to my mother, but I know that she is withholding my mother’s belongings just to hurt me and it’s working. I want my mothers stuff, all I have left is her memories.

I do know she is moving, where I don’t know and really could care less. I just hope that she moves in with her new boyfriend. I really feel sorry for him, just another fool that’s going to get milked dry. When they showed up for court I saw that she’s already driving his Cadillac Escalade truck, so she’s sinking the teeth in fast. What a fool, but then again so was I right?

The reason I hope that she moves in with the new meal ticket man is pretty simple. The new alimony law in Florida states that if it can be shown that either party filing for alimony is being supported by another party (regardless of relationship), you have no claim to alimony. Please lord let her be stupid, well more stupid, vindictive, nasty, hateful, greedy, there’s so many words that describe her I could go on forever. That’s sad isn’t it? To think that a person that you gave your soul to, took her grown kids and treated them like they were your own as well as the grandkids would treat you that way. I worked so hard for this family. Just one example- I worked 8 months worth of 12 hour days with only 10 days off in that period just so that we could have something in the bank when I retired. It all went to her desperate need for plastic surgery, designer clothes and her kids. All of my hard work, like water through her hands. She took all of that money out of our account, leaving me with 8 dollars. As we flow along through this saga I think most of you can now see why I can’t stand this bitch!!!!

Aza said it best, "You gave her the most, did more for her and her kids than all 5 of the other husbands and she wants to $^%K you the most." You are so right sweety, I love me some Aza, that’s my girl, tell it like it is! I still honestly believe that Mrs. Ed had all this planned out due to the timing of my retirement. Anyway, wish me luck and my buddies in retrieving my stuff! I will let you know what happens after Wednesday, better known as “D-Day“.

I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later.

Read the fine print!

Why do we pay all of the money for extra insurance or warranties on the items that we buy namely computers, when very rarely does it actually pay off?

Point in case: I went with Aza last week to a small time computer shop because her laptop was in multiple pieces (don’t ask). The shop had a big sign out front that read, “We Fix All Computers!” I told her that we should take it there to see if this shop could fix it for a reasonable price in a reasonable amount of time. Better yet fix it right there as we waited because it was something simple. Aza agrees, so in we walk to an empty shop. We are standing there waiting when all of a sudden out walks Lurch who was obviously the king of geeks and who will be hence forth known as “King Geek” (no offense to the self-proclaimed “geeks” in the audience). I looked at Aza, rolled my eyes and said “Oh Boy.”

So, this is how the conversation basically goes…

King Geek: “How may I help you?”

Aza presents her computer which is in two pieces and explains what happened to it, basically telling King Geek that it just needs four connections attached and the screws put back in.

King Geek: Laughs as though we’ve just requested a triple bypass and says, “Oh we don’t fix laptops here, only desk tops.”

I looked at Aza and King Geek in amazement.

Kojak: “Why does your sign say we fix all computers?”

King Geek: “Oh it says that?”

Kojak: “Uhhh, yeah it does” I snap back.

King Geek: “Geez it shouldn’t say that I guess.”

Kojak: “Yeah, ya think you might want to change that?”

King Geek: “Gosh I better.”

Aza: “Can you recommend anybody in town that might be able to fix it?”

King Geek: “Well I don’t usually give my competition any recommendations.”

Aza: “Well thanks so much for ALL of your help, you have been just tremendous!”

Kojak: “Yeah I agree, thanks I’ll make sure to tell all my friends about your shop.”

Needless to say we walked out very irritated, pissed off, jacked up and just plain ol mad.

Aza says to me, “Well I got the best warranty that money can buy when I bought this computer so let’s just drive over to where I purchased it and drop it off.” I agree so off we go.

We get to our destination walk in and start the process of explaining the situation. The employee looks up her information and see’s that she does indeed have the top of the line warranty. The employee tells Aza, “This should be no problem you have the best warranty you can buy. Which is a good thing considering your laptop is in multiple pieces.” The employee tells us that he will send the computer to Atlanta, they will look at it and either fix it or replace it and send back the hard drive. The employee is confident that it would be fixed because the warranty is the most expensive and best that you can get. “You can stomp on it, it can be in pieces, it can be run over and they will fix it or give you another computer” he says. We walk out feeling pretty good, just waiting to hear back from the company so we can come pick it up.

A couple of weeks go by so Aza calls the store to inquire about her computer. The company tells Aza that it was returned, however, it was returned un-repaired due to “Infestation”, “Whattttttt!!!???” Aza says, her face white as snow. “What kind of ‘infestation’ are you talking about?” The employee has no idea, so Aza is beyond mad and scared half to death, she tells the employee to get a manager on the phone. The phone is silent until the manager answers. Aza explains the situation, the manager is sure that this will be resolved, “Just give me a few days and come see me on Friday (14th) between 10am and 5pm I will take care of the situation.” he says. We have no choice so she hangs up, waiting until Friday.

The week flew by, just as it does when you get old like me. Aza and I walked into the business with hopes that the situation would be resolved. This was far beyond resolved, especially when we found out that the manager that was going to perform miracles for us wasn’t even there. We are face to face with somebody that has no clue what the heck is going on and is nasty to boot. Ms. Nasty gets on the phone for a few minutes pacing back and forth, finally coming back to us with a look of “You’re getting ready to get a big weenie in the behind and you’re not going to like it” She tells us that what they found was one tiny little pinhead size bug inside the computer. They refused to work on it, put it all back together, wrapped in shrink wrap and sent it back un-repaired. Bottom line. You are out eleven hundred dollars, so sorry, so sad have a great day. The only way that the warranty would not cover the computer was if any type of insect etc was found in it. Well howdy do how convenient! So Aza, mad as hell at this point said “So I can be sitting in the quad at school and if an ant crawls in it I’m screwed!?”, Ms. Nasty looking rather satisfied only responds with “Yep” and busies herself on the phone.

Well that just didn’t sit right with either one of us, first of all why the hell did the salesman tell Aza and her dad that the warranty covered absolutely everything, no questions asked? After getting Ms. Nasty’s attention again she says, “Oh well in the extra extra fine print it tells you that it won’t be covered under that one condition. We can pro rate your warranty.” Aza responds with, “Well gee wiz how sweet of you, I’m sorry I didn’t have my attorney there when I purchased it to read the fine print. How much will I get back?” Ms. Nasty now typing on the computer, “Oh let me see, hmmmm looks like one hundred and eleven dollars.” That’s quite a big difference when you pay over eleven hundred dollars for a computer and the super duper deluxe warranty. The kicker to this whole cluster is the only way you can get the pro rate back is in the form of a gift card or refund the credit card that was used. Aza, trying to be as polite as she can be said, “I don’t owe anything on the credit card, and I promise you I’m not doing business with your company anymore. The purchase was made over a year ago so just give me cash.” “Oh we can’t do that!” Ms. Nasty says. “Ohh yes you will!” I step in and say. “Get somebody on the phone now that has some power.” Aza asked for the phone number to their district office and Ms. Nasty gets an attitude. She goes back to a back room and scribbles a number on a torn piece of paper, then gives to another employee to bring out. Now that’s service baby.

I told Aza that we need to get district on the phone because we are not getting any satisfaction here. The little Ms. Nasty wannabe manager is bowed up at this point because she thinks she showed us. Here’s how smart this manager is, we asked for the phone number for the district office in Florida. The number we got was Iowa. Are you kidding me?!

Aza gets on the phone, in 5 minutes and 2 thousand miles away, we got some satisfaction. The gift card would be cashed out (which is what Aza asked Ms. Nasty to do in the first place) and the money given to us in cash. Needless to say, the little bowed up manager had to exhale and let all the air out of her bird chest.

Aza is out of a computer that she just paid off. What does she have to show for it you ask? A big Ben Franklin, and a few George Washington’s.

Moral of the story- READ THE FINE PRINT FOLKS!

I’m Out And Well Talk Later!



Update: I was able to talk to some of our IT guys in the department. One in particular used to work on Toshiba’s in a former life and offered to take a look at it. He called this morning and said he’d probably have it fixed by Friday. So much for a useless two hundred and fifty dollar warranty!

They tried to open a can of Kung-Fu!

I will be updating on the gun shop issue soon but for now there's this...

One of the many things that I love about my job is the fact that you just never know what you’re going to deal with day to day. Now, sometimes that can be a little irritating when you’re trying to eat, especially when you only have 30 minutes to do so.

I was sitting in my favorite Japanese buffet restaurant, when I saw a lady, what I at the time I assumed was her husband and her service dog come in. The lady appeared to be sight impaired, so I just continued to mind my business and eat. I saw all of the little Japanese folks running around yelling and screaming at each other, as if Godzilla was launching a full scale invasion against their restaurant. I once again tried to just eat my food. That’s when it happened, the “Head guy” comes walking over to me with a look of sheer terror on his face. I knew what was coming so I took a big bite of food and resigned myself to the fact that a complete and undisturbed meal probably wasn’t in the cards for me tonight.

Head guy in his broken English says to me “Lady with dog can not be in restaurant with dog!” I attempted to explain to him that the dog was a service dog, she needed him to help her see and that by law he can not ask them to leave. If they were prepared to be sued by these folks by all means tell them they need to go, but I’m not going to ask them to leave. Well he didn’t like that at all so he started the whole yelling in foreign language to his family thing, which caused all of them to start glaring at me like they were going to pull out a Samurai sword and make short work of my head. I just wanted to finish my food and get out of there! Obviously too much to ask.

The lady got up with her dog and proceeded to the buffet bar. The head guy went nuts, ran over to her and started screaming at her in the best English he could muster, “You no take dog to food bar!” The lady was scared to death. Her husband came to her defense, trying to explain to him that she could indeed bring the dog to the bar. Head guy kept on until I finally had to step in to get him to stop the attack. These folks were devastated that they were being refused service. I calmed them down, attempting once again to try and explain to the head guy the law. That was a complete waste of time. The couple was so upset, they left, of course not without making sure head guy was threatened with a law suit. Head guy was screaming, “You owe me money, you get tea!” I ignored his rants.

I grabbed my check, went to the counter and paid my bill. They were very nasty to me refusing to even look my way. I could care less, I did my job.

I wish people that are not native to this country would understand that people with disabilities have the same rights here that they do. If they have a service dog, they are entitled to take that dog everywhere any “able-bodied” person can go. Not considering people with disabilities is walking directly into a trick bag. In fact, my department is being sued as well as the individual officer over another disability issue. Even law enforcement isn’t exempt from recognizing and respecting people with disabilities.

I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later.

A rant and call for opinions

I saw something today that absolutely shocked me, but probably shouldn’t have. I took the advice of The Bronze and Fire Fox. I went to the gun shop with Aza so we could take a look at the other model Glock that was brought up in the comments of my previous post. As we walked in we were face to face with a young couple holding a 40. Caliber Smith & Wesson pistol pointed at the front door. I was instantly uncomfortable but walked in anyway. We stood behind these people with their 4 year old little boy wandering around between them, just in amazement of the guns. As we are standing there, the hooker looking momma has a firearm in her hand. She is dry firing the weapon and once again pointing it all over the place. Now, before I go on, Aza grew up around guns and has a vast knowledge of firearms. She also is very aware of gun safety as well, because her dad owned a gun shop. He was a certified gun dealer and gun smith. So needless to say we both are feeling somewhat uncomfortable with how this couple is mishandling these firearms.

Hooker Momma is laughing about how she has never held a gun, much less fired one. She has this gun in her hand, racking it, absentmindedly pointing it at all of the employees and now us behind her, all the while chewing the gum in her mouth like a cow in pasture never thinking twice about the gun she’s flailing around. The gun suddenly has made its way pointed directly at Aza who was looking in one of the glass cases. I instinctively pushed her out of the way as I stepped out of the way myself. I’m pissed now, very frustrated and really ready to go the %^&K off. Once Aza realizes why I pushed her out of the way she looks at me as if to say I’m going to kick her hooker #$S if she points that gun at me again. I agree but keep my mouth shut.

The husband has a gun in his hand now, it’s obvious that he has never owned, touched, or fired a gun himself just simply based on the way he is manhandling it. We are really uncomfortable at this point. That’s when it happens, this stupid bastard takes the gun and without so much as a second thought, turns toward his little boy. For a moment the barrel was pointed directly at this child. Aza looks at me visibly shaken and says “I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE I HAVE TO GO TO THE CAR BEFORE I SAY SOMETHING THAT I SHOULDN’T”. I completely agree, but I stay.

The little boy is all over the counter pointing at the guns saying “cool”. Hooker Momma speaks up and says, “No, they’re not cool they’re bad honey.” In the same breath she looks at the clerk and says, “Let me play with that one again!” I am sick to my stomach at this point, I know all you that are police officers understand how hard it was for me not to say something, but not being in uniform and honestly flabbergasted at what was taking place, believe or not I didn’t. The clerk brings out a Glock and is explaining that there is no safety with that model. Hooker Momma interrupts him and says to her idiot husband, “Oh I don’t know about that, you know honey, that he {she gestures towards the child} will want to pick it up and play with it when he gets older.” By now I am beside myself. I simply could not listen to anymore, so I had to walk away. At the other end of the counter I finished conducting my business with Larry.

I stood back and glanced over a few times in pure disgust watching these two playing with these guns. I heard the clerk tell them that he had four kids and he never had problems with them; he never locked his guns up. I just shook my head and completed my business, leaving as quickly as possible before I lost my mind.

When I got back in the car I talked to Aza and her dad about how they felt I should handle the situation. The consensus was to go back, in uniform, talk to the manager/owner and just explain to him that I can’t in good conscious by a gun from them based and how they allow patrons to treat the guns the way they do; in such a careless manner. My feelings are that the store employees have an absolute duty to watch every person in that store with regards to gun safety. They should bring them to task when a blatant gun safety rule is broken. I feel that these people are in a unique position to educate the public while they have their attention and are showing the weapons. I never heard the mention of a gun safety course by the clerk to either of these obviously uneducated potential gun owners. I certainly hope in the very near future that their baby won’t pick up that gun and accidentally shoot himself or somebody else because his parents didn’t take the time to educate themselves, or him about the seriousness of carelessly handling a firearm. I can tell you I have had a gut full of seeing children and/or their friends lying in a pool of the blood while their parents stand there dumb founded trying to figure out why it happened. Yesterday Aza and I met “why it happened.”

I would like to get the input of my fellow bloggers, especially Law enforcement officers on how you would handle the situation at this point. My sensibilities are completely offended now. I’m thinking that if I go to the owner and explain that I want the money back that I put down on that Glock; explaining that it’s because I don’t feel right supporting a business that blatantly disregards their responsibility to educate the public on such a critical subject- it might actually make someone take notice.

I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later.

Love at first sight!

I definitely have the best job in the world for doing a little shopping every once in awhile. I mean I work pretty hard for the majority of my shift, I deserve some down time right? Well I think so, but anyway, since I have been kicked out of my house and am without access to any and all of my possessions in it, including my off duty gun I have been thinking about another gun to carry when I’m off duty. I love my Glock 40 service weapon but it’s just too big to really conceal it.

So I’m rollin down the road and I see a gun shop billboard outside that said “Glock 40 all sizes $489.00.” I know most of you are probably pretty educated as far as firearms go, but I really haven’t been that involved in pricing etc. I do know that these guns are selling retail for around $600.00 dollars. I decided to take a minute to go inside and take a look around.

I was met by a very nice gentleman, “Larry”. I questioned him about the price and he told me that it was indeed the price listed. I told him that I was very impressed with one Glock in particular, however due to my current circumstances I just couldn’t afford to pay that kind of money for anything right now. Larry told me to wait a second that he would be right back. A few moments later, he rounded the counter with a big smile, he said that he would let me put the gun on layaway for 90 days, if I needed more time I could take as long as I needed and in addition he would take off another $40.00 dollars bringing the total to $449.00! I was speechless, this guy genuinely was not only concerned for my situation, but for me as a person. Larry expressed to me that he knows how dangerous it is out there for us, he said that he just felt the need to help me. I thought it was one of the nicest things that anybody in the retail business has done for me in a long time. Needless to say, I eagerly put down the down payment. So, hopefully in a month or so I will have a second weapon/backup to carry just in case I need it, ya know, if my service weapon is jacked by some gangsta or something.

I have a picture of my new girlfriend. She sits to the left of the 40 that I carry. You can see the difference in size, she’s rather demur so concealment won’t be an issue. Isn’t she sexy? Hey, give me a break at least she’s not taking all my money!!

I would like to know from some of you gun aficionados if you think I got a good deal. Oh, he also threw in an extra magazine, as well as the magazine extender that creates a little bit bigger grip.

I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later.

The latest saga with Mrs. Ed…

So, I got a phone call Tuesday morning from my attorney’s office around 10 o’clock. I was half asleep and not real happy being woken up after working all night. The paralegal tells me that Mrs. Ed’s attorney called to tell my attorney that the mediation will have to be rescheduled. What!? I was instantly awake at this point and furious to say the least. The excuse was the mediator suddenly had a conflict. My response to that, “What the $%^k ever!” So let me put this in perspective. I now have to wait until April 17th to possibly have any kind of resolution, I am still paying her $2800.00 dollars a month and I’m still eating Ramen noodles! Oh, but it gets better. The paralegal informs me that they have also filed an Injunction For Dissipation Of Marital Assets, “Uh, what the hell is that!?”

The only response I got was that it has something to do with my retirement. Somehow I guess I saw this coming, I mean, what the hell else can she try and do to me? I could only sit back and laugh.

My buddy had his daughter call the business that Mrs. Ed is not working at to try to book an appointment with her. When she answered the phone, she was so excited to hook her up with an appointment, she even told her “I work 5 days a week and I will stay late if I have to get you in.” Well that’s good info for me to use against her since she supposedly can’t work. The kicker to the conversation was this mind blowing piece of information- and I quote “I have to get you in before March the 7th because I will be going on my dream vacation to New York!” Oh hell noooooooo!, she could never go anywhere with me because she was always in too much "pain". Now all of a sudden she’s flying all over the damn place! A month and a half ago she was in Tennessee!

I just hope that this all back fires on her @#S, because this is becoming comical at this point. Somebody has got to see through all this crap and see that she is playing the system. We’ll I’m hungry. Time to eat some noodles. Got any good Ramen recipes?

I’m Out And We’ll Talk Later.